Corrupt a Wish

[skybluesky]

"Lois, nobody wants to be Peter Criss"

my favorite thing ever said on Family Guy

Granted, but you never want to have sex again.

I wish I didn't have a job

[Rayzor]

Granted. Enjoy living in the street.

btw: never having sex is no threat, I never get any anyhow!

I wish I had butter sticks wrapped in bacon and topped with syrup ... mmmmmmmmmmmm

[skybluesky]

I think you've corrupted your own wish there. You will be so sick. I just... not even I would eat that.

I wish I could meet Johnny Depp

[Kevin]

Granted and he overlooked/ snubbed you in the crowd of thousands of other screaming fans - nothing personal of course .

I wish I were a psychic .

[skybluesky]

You are now bff with Dionne Warwick and have to sing "That's What Friends Are For" on her Psychic Friends Network

I wish I had a best friend

[Kevin]

Granted , and now you yourself singing " I Am My Own Best Friend " ...

I wish I could I could really believe that and behave as though I don't care in the least about our 'celebrity culture' .

[miamisammy29]

Granted. You now live in Tokyo.

I wish I had a bigass fish tank with bigass sharks in it.

[skybluesky]

Granted but bloof will live with you and tell you shark facts ad nauseum

I wish I could eat nothing but spaghetti

[Kevin]

Granted - but that is exactly what you get : uncooked , no sauce nor toppings .

I wish I were a professional hockey player .

[TheLizard]

Granted, enjoy your tooth.

I wish I could visit another planet.

[Uncle Joe]

Welcome to Planet Hollywood.

I wish it was summer.

[_Laurie_]

Granted..but now you are all shwetty and your sticking to the pleather chair...

I wish I had a rack like Peaches...

[skybluesky]

Granted, but you are forever knocking things over and spilling on your shirt (Trust me, I know)

I wish I had a smaller rack

[_Laurie_]

Granted

Your larger rack will now be replaced with a smaller shoe rack....you may need to throw out a few pairs...

[_Laurie_]

I wish I had my very own wine cellar...

[Uncle Joe]

Granted, UncleJoe here to sell you a nice Chablis. Oops, didn't you say wine seller?

I wish I could give my wife Joann the world for her birthday tomorrow.

[Jenny]

Granted, enjoy carrying that weight on your shoulders, Atlas.

I wish that I could take the whole summer off work

[Uncle Joe]

You're fired!

I wish I hadn't done that.

[phil]

Too late. Say three Our Fathers and one Act Of Contrition.

I wish my dog would stop eating the cat food.

[Jenny]

Granted, now he goes in the litter box when he wants a snack.

I wish for world peace

[Uncle Joe]

That's a wish I wish I could grant. It's a wish I wish someone could grant. anyone.

I wish there was a God.

[Farin]

there is: the God of one small African cult

and since we never praid to him (only to 'false' gods) we all go straight to hell...

I wish I would win the lottery

[skybluesky]

You drew the special rock and got stoned to death in a Shirley Jackson story.

I wish I could meet Michael Stipe

[Rayzor]

Granted. r-g meet Micheal Stipe who hails from Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan! A 78 year old farmer living in a shack.

I wish I were more of a handyman...

[_Laurie_]

Granted you now have 3 hands!

I wish I had a years supply of salami...