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What's your nickname?

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The following is an excerpt from a children's book, Captain Underpants and the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants by Dave Pilkey. The evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names.....

Use the first letter of your first name to determine your NEW first name:

a = stinky

b = lumpy

c = buttercup

d = gidget

e = crusty

f = greasy

g = fluffy

h = cheeseball

i = chim-chim

j = poopsie

k = flunky

l = booger

m = pinky

n = zippy

o = goober

p = doofus

q = slimy

r = loopy

s = snotty

t = falafel

u = dorkey

v = squeezit

w = oprah

x = skipper

y = dinky

z = zsa-zsa

Use the first letter of your last name to determine the first half of your NEW last name:

a = diaper

b = toilet

c = giggle

d = bubble

e = girdle

f = barf

g = lizard

h = waffle

i = cootie

j = monkey

k = potty

l = liver

m = banana

n = rhino

o = burger

p = hamster

q = toad

r = gizzard

s = pizza

t = gerbil

u = chicken

v = pickle

w = chuckle

x =tofu

y = gorilla

z = stinker

Use the last letter of your last name to determine the second half of your NEW last name:

a = head

b = mouth

c = face

d = nose

e = tush

f = breath

g = pants

h = shorts

i = lips

j = honker

k = butt

l = brain

m = tushie

n = chunks

o = hiney

p = biscuits

q = toes

r = buns

s = fanny

t = sniffer

u = sprinkles

v = kisser

w = squirt

x =humperdinck

y = brains

z = juice

Thus, for example, George Bush's new name is Fluffy Toiletshorts. Bill Clinton becomes Lumpy Gigglechunks, Tony Blair becomes Falafel Toiletbuns and Saddam Hussein becomes Snotty Wafflechunks.

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