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Top Ten Positive Things That Will Happen Now That The NBA Lockout Is Over

10. One of the Kardashians can find a new husband.

9. The Miami Heat will not win the title... again

8. The number of arrests of NBA players should be lower now that they're off the streets and have a job.

7. Sales of Basketball Bobblehead Dolls will increase two-fold.

6. Charles Barkley will once again be able to comment on a sport that he at least knows something about.

5. A tick upward on the employment front.

4. Less gun violence.

3. You can dig those goofy, baggy shorts out of your closet. It's on.

2. Cheerleaders will resume cheering. :googly: :googly:

1. Even less people will watch the NBA.

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Top Ten Advantages Of Having A Name Like "Mitt"

10. People automatically think you excel at sports.

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Posted

Top Ten Advantages Of Having A Name Like "Mitt"

10. People automatically think you excel at sports.

9. It's a good porn star name, in case you lose the election.

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Posted

Top Ten Advantages Of Having A Name Like "Mitt"

10. People automatically think you excel at sports.

9. It's a good porn star name, in case you lose the election.

8. It's a better name than Newt.

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Posted

Top Ten Advantages Of Having A Name Like "Mitt"

10. People automatically think you excel at sports.

9. It's a good porn star name, in case you lose the election.

8. It's a better name than Newt.

7. It's a whole lot better name than Barack.

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Posted

Top Ten Advantages Of Having A Name Like "Mitt"

10. People automatically think you excel at sports.

9. It's a good porn star name, in case you lose the election.

8. It's a better name than Newt.

7. It's a whole lot better name than Barack.

6. Stutterers will never say your name wrong.

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Posted

Top Ten Advantages Of Having A Name Like "Mitt"

10. People automatically think you excel at sports.

9. It's a good porn star name, in case you lose the election.

8. It's a better name than Newt.

7. It's a whole lot better name than Barack.

6. Stutterers will never say your name wrong.

5. Through a common thread, you'll never be separated from your mate.

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Posted

Top Ten Advantages Of Having A Name Like "Mitt"

10. People automatically think you excel at sports.

9. It's a good porn star name, in case you lose the election.

8. It's a better name than Newt.

7. It's a whole lot better name than Barack.

6. Stutterers will never say your name wrong.

5. Through a common thread, you'll never be separated from your mate.

4. It rhymes with dimwit, nitwit and misfit.

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Posted

Top Ten Advantages Of Having A Name Like "Mitt"

10. People automatically think you excel at sports.

9. It's a good porn star name, in case you lose the election.

8. It's a better name than Newt.

7. It's a whole lot better name than Barack.

6. Stutterers will never say your name wrong.

5. Through a common thread, you'll never be separated from your mate.

4. It rhymes with dimwit, nitwit and misfit.

3. You can catch a 95-mph fastball....with your face!

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Posted

Top Ten Advantages Of Having A Name Like "Mitt"

10. People automatically think you excel at sports.

9. It's a good porn star name, in case you lose the election.

8. It's a better name than Newt.

7. It's a whole lot better name than Barack.

6. Stutterers will never say your name wrong.

5. Through a common thread, you'll never be separated from your mate.

4. It rhymes with dimwit, nitwit and misfit.

3. You can catch a 95-mph fastball....with your face!

2. You can put the president's balls in the palm of your hand and tell him, "YOU'RRRE OUT!"

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  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

Top Ten Advantages Of Having A Name Like "Mitt"

10. People automatically think you excel at sports.

9. It's a good porn star name, in case you lose the election.

8. It's a better name than Newt.

7. It's a whole lot better name than Barack.

6. Stutterers will never say your name wrong.

5. Through a common thread, you'll never be separated from your mate.

4. It rhymes with dimwit, nitwit and misfit.

3. You can catch a 95-mph fastball....with your face!

2. You can put the president's balls in the palm of your hand and tell him, "YOU'RRRE OUT!"

1. It'll be a BIG advantage when you're running for office against someone named "Newt".

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Top Ten Highlights In The Life of Kim Jong-Il

10. His 70-yard touchdown run in the 1963 Rose Bowl game.

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Top Ten Highlights In The Life of Kim Jong-Il

10. His 70-yard touchdown run in the 1963 Rose Bowl game.

9. When he shared in the invention of mahjong.

8. The birth of his son, Ross Perot.

7. Tried to become a ladies man in the 1990's by hanging with MiamiSammy for a wild weekend of orgies and swing clubs.

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Posted

Top Ten Highlights In The Life of Kim Jong-Il

10. His 70-yard touchdown run in the 1963 Rose Bowl game.

9. When he shared in the invention of mahjong.

8. The birth of his son, Ross Perot.

7. Tried to become a ladies man in the 1990's by hanging with MiamiSammy for a wild weekend of orgies and swing clubs.

6. Sitting in the Dunk Tank at South Korea's World Fair in 2010.

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Posted

Top Ten Highlights In The Life of Kim Jong-Il

10. His 70-yard touchdown run in the 1963 Rose Bowl game.

9. When he shared in the invention of mahjong.

8. The birth of his son, Ross Perot.

7. Tried to become a ladies man in the 1990's by hanging with MiamiSammy for a wild weekend of orgies and swing clubs.

6. Sitting in the Dunk Tank at South Korea's World Fair in 2010.

5. Deeming the virgin birth of his son, old What's-His-Name.

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Top Ten Highlights In The Life of Kim Jong-Il

10. His 70-yard touchdown run in the 1963 Rose Bowl game.

9. When he shared in the invention of mahjong.

8. The birth of his son, Ross Perot.

7. Tried to become a ladies man in the 1990's by hanging with MiamiSammy for a wild weekend of orgies and swing clubs.

6. Sitting in the Dunk Tank at South Korea's World Fair in 2010.

5. Deeming the virgin birth of his son, old What's-His-Name.

4. Raising his Health guru son, Kim Jong Not-Ill

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Posted

Top Ten Highlights In The Life of Kim Jong-Il

10. His 70-yard touchdown run in the 1963 Rose Bowl game.

9. When he shared in the invention of mahjong.

8. The birth of his son, Ross Perot.

7. Tried to become a ladies man in the 1990's by hanging with MiamiSammy for a wild weekend of orgies and swing clubs.

6. Sitting in the Dunk Tank at South Korea's World Fair in 2010.

5. Deeming the virgin birth of his son, old What's-His-Name.

4. Raising his Health guru son, Kim Jong Not-Ill

3. That one time he almost got to nail Lucy Liu.

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Posted

Top Ten Highlights In The Life of Kim Jong-Il

10. His 70-yard touchdown run in the 1963 Rose Bowl game.

9. When he shared in the invention of mahjong.

8. The birth of his son, Ross Perot.

7. Tried to become a ladies man in the 1990's by hanging with MiamiSammy for a wild weekend of orgies and swing clubs.

6. Sitting in the Dunk Tank at South Korea's World Fair in 2010.

5. Deeming the virgin birth of his son, old What's-His-Name.

4. Raising his Health guru son, Kim Jong Not-Ill

3. That one time he almost got to nail Lucy Liu.

2.That one final screaming train ride.

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Posted

Top Ten Highlights In The Life of Kim Jong-Il

10. His 70-yard touchdown run in the 1963 Rose Bowl game.

9. When he shared in the invention of mahjong.

8. The birth of his son, Ross Perot.

7. Tried to become a ladies man in the 1990's by hanging with MiamiSammy for a wild weekend of orgies and swing clubs.

6. Sitting in the Dunk Tank at South Korea's World Fair in 2010.

5. Deeming the virgin birth of his son, old What's-His-Name.

4. Raising his Health guru son, Kim Jong Not-Ill

3. That one time he almost got to nail Lucy Liu.

2.That one final screaming train ride.

1. Getting his picture taken with Mickey and Goofy at Disneyland back in '92.

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Top Ten Things You Wish You Could Have Told Bin Laden Before They Whacked Him

10. Hey, buddy, nice hat!

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Top Ten Things You Wish You Could Have Told Bin Laden Before They Whacked Him

10. Hey, buddy, nice hat!

9. Live and Let Live! Mofo! The world is a better place without YOUR IDIOTIC, RELIGIOUS, FANATICAL VIOLENCE!!!

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Top Ten Things You Wish You Could Have Told Bin Laden Before They Whacked Him

10. Hey, buddy, nice hat!

9. Live and Let Live! Mofo! The world is a better place without YOUR IDIOTIC, RELIGIOUS, FANATICAL VIOLENCE!!!

8. Do you feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?

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Top Ten Things You Wish You Could Have Told Bin Laden Before They Whacked Him

10. Hey, buddy, nice hat!

9. Live and Let Live! Mofo! The world is a better place without YOUR IDIOTIC, RELIGIOUS, FANATICAL VIOLENCE!!!

8. Do you feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?

7. If you're Sunni, you ain't Shi'ite.

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Top Ten Things You Wish You Could Have Told Bin Laden Before They Whacked Him

10. Hey, buddy, nice hat!

9. Live and Let Live! Mofo! The world is a better place without YOUR IDIOTIC, RELIGIOUS, FANATICAL VIOLENCE!!!

8. Do you feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?

7. If you're Sunni, you ain't Shi'ite.

6. Your porn tapes are overdue...sorry.

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Top Ten Things You Wish You Could Have Told Bin Laden Before They Whacked Him

10. Hey, buddy, nice hat!

9. Live and Let Live! Mofo! The world is a better place without YOUR IDIOTIC, RELIGIOUS, FANATICAL VIOLENCE!!!

8. Do you feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?

7. If you're Sunni, you ain't Shi'ite.

6. Your porn tapes are overdue...sorry.

5. Paper or plastic?

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Top Ten Things You Wish You Could Have Told Bin Laden Before They Whacked Him

10. Hey, buddy, nice hat!

9. Live and Let Live! Mofo! The world is a better place without YOUR IDIOTIC, RELIGIOUS, FANATICAL VIOLENCE!!!

8. Do you feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?

7. If you're Sunni, you ain't Shi'ite.

6. Your porn tapes are overdue...sorry.

5. Paper or plastic?

4. Lights Out!

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