Jump to content

Standup Tragedy


Recommended Posts

Jerry Seinfeld: "Did you ever notice your life is just an significant insect on societies windshield? I mean, you could die tonight, and the world would go on, unfazed"

Bill Engvall: "Heeeeere's your death certificate"

Dave Chappelle: "I don't know where I belong. I'm too hypocritical to be a black, but I'm not enough of a cracker to be white. My life is a constant struggle. I'm a man without a country"

Jeff Foxworthy: "Boy, my wife has me so whipped, she's completely ruined my life. I honestly couldn't be farther from the goals I set early on in life. I've completely lost my purpose and freedom."

Bill Cosby: "Ooooooh, ya got da teens, and when they talk, it's like 'zop skop diddly dop" because you don't know whhhhat they're saying. Grammar today is so bad, and I seem to be the only one who cares. This nation is going to hell, and I alooooooone can't stop it."

And instead of laughing, the audience cries.

Go ahead and add yours.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Create New...