Lost the Fish I Wished For

[J Hill]

this poem was inspired by a short story by Etgar Keret......and a little by V. Woolf

I used to have a magic fish, I even named it Linnie.

It didn't have a last name though, 'cuz that would just be silly.

I kept it in a pickle jar; we talked while I did dishes.

I used to have a magic fish,

It really had three wishes.

Don't you ride a bike, that has a broken sprocket,

and don't ever go swimming with rocks in all your

pockets.

Never dine on bitterness, even when it tastes delicious.

Further, never tell an inside joke, when on an outdoor phone.

And don't go asking for all your wishes,

you could end up alone.

@2011 JDH

*the edit*

"You shouldn't dine on bitterness, even if it tastes delicous....

And, don't go ending up all alone,

with nothing but three wishes."

Edited May 31, 2011 by Guest
few words

[Jenny]

I like it, J, especially after the edits. As silly as the rhymes are, they are profound.

[Uncle Joe]

I like it too.

[Shawna]

Don't you ride a bike, that has a broken sprocket,

and don't ever go swimming with rocks in all your

pockets

This is the stanza(?) that throws it off for me. The cadence is perfect until this, and then it goes off course.

I do like it, it's whimsical, it's fun, and it has a message. I just wish that cadence creature didn't get in my way!

Well done, though, I like it.

[MuzikTyme]

I think you've emitted "roes" of knowledge, J Hill!

Hopefully, they'll spawn.

I mean...who doesn't desire something taboo or the thing everyone talks about yet seldom does?

I'm a button-hole finder. There is something for everyone....lol

[Steel2Velvet]

Very effective, J.

[MuzikTyme]

Effective is what I meant.

S2V is a master of words and I think you're the same regarding your writing skills, J Hill.

...and...

One more thing;

If you wish for a fish

And it doesn't come true

Then get off yer arse