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One morning my love asked me…

And I said lost is now one thing I would never ever be.

Not so much was I for romance...

But this lady made me see.

With her, she holds my golden key.

Forever the optimist…

And now I speak in tongues...

Where with her complication is overration.

Work distracts from heartbreak for this poor dame.

Pain dares your metal and drains your oil.

Hello squeaky thing.

Goodbye human being -

One with such love to give.

I won’t waste you.

Do you think it over-rhymes? It's a work-in-progress and I only did it in about 30-40 minuets... I'd like to maybe add more to it and tell a spin-off story maybe... I dunno, whattaya think for starters?..

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One with such love to give.

I won’t waste you.

I love this last line - what a perfect way to end a poem. Perfect.

I don't know what the word "overration" means... Your play on the word "metal" is a good twist, and I really enjoyed the unique style you have with putting together these words.

"Over-rhymes"? No... in fact, the cadence for me was too off to even really notice a rhyme, but that doesn't make it any less enjoyable.

Nicely done. :)

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