RonJonSurfer Posted August 23, 2007 Report Share Posted August 23, 2007 5 Secrets You Should Keep From Your Partner Posted by David Zinczenko It starts out simply enough: A man and woman get together, they share some wine, they go back to her place, their relationship grows, they laugh and they fight, and they become-tada!-a couple. And then something happens: They're supposed to share everything with each other. Their fears. Their dreams. Their thoughts. Their bills. Their medicine cabinets. And that's when this simple little romance starts to get complicated. in most relationships, there's such a thing as too much sharing-and I believe that a little discretion at the right time in the right situation is not only a good thing, but also could actually improve relationships. As long as you're not breaking the relationship rules-like playing tonsil hockey while the goalie isn't watching-then a little mystery can be a good thing. Here, five secrets you should keep to yourself-because not saying something will actually speak volumes. (And just so you don't think that I'm pushing to abolish the honesty policy, you'll read about the things you should never keep from your partner next time.) You Don't Turn Me on Right Now Granted, there will be days when your partner walks into the room and everything sparkles-moments like these make us count our blessings. But there are going to be other moments when your woman looks less like Cindy Crawford and more like Broderick Crawford, and when your guy is less Hugh Grant than Lou Grant. But when the occasional fashion faux pas or haircut from Edward Scissorshands comes around, swallow your tongue. If you want him or her to wear certain styles, compliment what you like, and ignore what you don't. Eventually, they'll get the message-but without the hurt feelings. I Flirt With Others at Work The stats don't lie: About 40 percent of men and 35 percent of women have lusted after a co-worker-without ever making a move. Even if you have no intention of taking it anywhere, nobody wants to think of their significant others spending 8, 10, 12 hours a day around flirtatious and attractive co-workers, especially when they look, smell and behave at their very best. Want to share sexual secrets? Confess your attraction to Hollywood celebs, not the co-workers in the adjacent cube. I Can't Stand Your Friends Your partner's circle of friends probably come in three different categories: a perfect package, nice enough, and how the hell can the two of you be friends? In that last category, there are all kinds of crazies-maybe she's too controlling, or maybe he's a bad influence. Whatever the case, know your audience. You may not like the friends, but your partner has more history with them than with you. So while they may not rank high on your personal list, keep it to yourself. Boxing out a man's friends is a relationship deal breaker, according to 83 percent of men we surveyed. And 62 percent of women would end a relationship if a guy doesn't get along with her friends. I Still Think About My Ex While it's natural to think about your ex, the Internet has increasingly made exes a bigger threat than ever before. The phenomenon of searching online for one's ex, which the majority of Americans admit to, can really make your partner jealous and fearful-especially since the phenomenon of people reuniting with very old flames has recently exploded (again, because of the Internet). You put your exes in the past; do the same with any conversation about them. I Can't Live Without You Why? Number one, it's not true; you can live without them. And number two, the key to a successful long-term relationship is to ensure that you've got your own life. You can say I love you, I enjoy you, I desire you, I appreciate you. You don't say I can't live without you. A partner should never feel trapped. He or she should be making a choice every day to be with you. And you, with them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jenny Posted August 23, 2007 Report Share Posted August 23, 2007 I agree with that last one.....I don't think it would be sweet to hear someone say that, it would be almost scary. I think a good alternative to saying "I can't live without you" would be "my life would not be as fun (or happy, or interesting) without you". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Jane 61 Posted August 23, 2007 Report Share Posted August 23, 2007 I do too Jenny, it is a little scary and stalkerish!! The one about the ex, I was in a relationship like that and I just had enough, don't compare or don't bring the ex up in certain intimate moments, talk about a mood breaker!! We all have our secrets! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blind-fitter Posted August 23, 2007 Report Share Posted August 23, 2007 What about "without you, I'd be a total f*****g mess", as an alternative? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
edna Posted August 23, 2007 Report Share Posted August 23, 2007 You put your exes in the past; do the same with any conversation about them. So true... they can come to have dinner with us and we can even spend a weekend all together, but let´s not get into details... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Uncle Joe Posted August 23, 2007 Report Share Posted August 23, 2007 Oh edna, let's do!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batman Posted August 23, 2007 Report Share Posted August 23, 2007 5 secrets you should keep from your partner: Amy, Melissa, Michelle, Julie, and Laura. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarcM Posted August 24, 2007 Report Share Posted August 24, 2007 What about "without you, I'd be a total f*****g mess", as an alternative? That would work on many levels. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Red Fish Posted August 25, 2007 Report Share Posted August 25, 2007 While it's natural to think about your ex, the Internet has increasingly made exes a bigger threat than ever before. The phenomenon of searching online for one's ex, which the majority of Americans admit to, can really make your partner jealous and fearful-especially since the phenomenon of people reuniting with very old flames has recently exploded (again, because of the Internet). You put your exes in the past; do the same with any conversation about them. LOLWUT Posh, statistics. People just make those up on the spot. 90% of all people know that. Secondly, only stupid people fall in love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Seeker Posted August 26, 2007 Report Share Posted August 26, 2007 You're just jealous. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Red Fish Posted August 26, 2007 Report Share Posted August 26, 2007 Jealous of what? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Seeker Posted August 26, 2007 Report Share Posted August 26, 2007 The stupid people who fall in love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Red Fish Posted August 26, 2007 Report Share Posted August 26, 2007 Okay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Seeker Posted August 26, 2007 Report Share Posted August 26, 2007 I knew it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Floydaholic Posted August 26, 2007 Report Share Posted August 26, 2007 Thanks for the cool post, there's alot of handy advice and tips in it. Of course, it will become more relevant to me, when I actually have a partner!!. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PSYCHOcatholic Posted August 27, 2007 Report Share Posted August 27, 2007 Yeah, and when i get a girlfriend, ill just be thinking of this list the entire time! Lol! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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