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Tenacious_Peaches

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When I look at my daughter

I know that I would go to the ends of the earth for her.

Why don’t you feel that way about me?

When I look at my daughter

I know that I would rather hurt myself than to ever hurt her.

Why don’t you feel that way about me?

When I look at my daughter

I know that I would sacrifice every bit of my own happiness to ensure hers.

Why don’t you feel that way about me?

When I look at my daughter

I know that I would die for her.

Why don’t you feel that way about me?

When I look at my daughter

I love her so much my heart aches.

Why don’t you feel that way about me?

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Very touching poem,Peaches, and I am so sorry that you never had your mother's love. On the good side, you are breaking the cycle, so your daughter will never feel that way about you.

I feel very lucky that love was something that I always had plenty of in my childhood. My husband's family history is a little more chaotic, so I think that is a lot of the reason why he married me. He saw the love and support in my family and wanted that for himself.

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peaches, that poem is such a paradox of emotions - there is so much hurt and pain in how you feel about your relationship with your mother. but there is also so much love and joy between you and your own daughter. sue is absolutely right, that is the positive side which you should (and mostly do!) focus on. i also agree with jenny, you are breaking the cycle which is such a strong and brave thing to do. unfortunately my father lived for years with hurt from what his father did and then turned around and did exactly the same thing to my mum, brothers and me. you will never make that mistake because you're too good, smart and special to. well done gorgeous laydee! much love-xo

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Peaches, that is such an emotional poem, very touching. It shows that the love you did not feel from your mother, wont stop you from the love you have for your daughter....very nice.

a nice big squishy hug for you two

)))))))peaches and daughter((((((((((((((((

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Peaches....I don't even know what to say. This made my heart ache. I am adopted and I know why I was given up for adoption and it makes sense, and I was lucky to have to wonderful parents that wanted me for a daughter. I give all the love I have to my little girl, as I know you do to yours. I won't say I understand how you feel, I can't since I have not been there, but I will say it is woderful that you are a better person and mother than what you had as a child. Bless you and your little girl.

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Peaches ... Kari, I think what you wrote is profound and your words mirror the hearts of many, many people in addition to your own. Your writing down these intimate thoughts and distressed feelings is not only therapy for all who ponder them, but let's us know that we are not alone in our similar questions that seem to have no answer.

Perhaps your writing, that acts as a relief valve for others by letting them know they bear their pain not alone, puts a bit of purpose and reason to the unreasonable that your poem explores.

Hardships never seem fair. Difficulties never welcome. But adversity, if seen as opportunity, can build the strongest character of all. One of my most enduring guidelines I have ever put to paper is just four words:

To forgive

Frees both

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Peaches...

I hate that you have those things to deal with. I've had the same with my father. Took a long time to come to terms with it. You're a better person for it though. Your daughter is a lucky little girl. Kisses to you both.

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Kari... wow. That's what I say when I can't think of anything else, because my tongue is tied and my heart is breaking. It amazes me that someone such as yourself could have experienced a background void of love from someone important. But I guess it makes sense, because you are a strong person and I know that a lot of times strength comes from adversity.

My mom is a very strong person, too - or she was before this whole debacle, anyway. I always knew she was treated as a scullery maid when she was growing up, which is why she jumped at the opportunity to marry my dad - because he'd get her out of that house. She told me the story of the night they eloped. Said she went into the house that evening, told her mom and dad that she was going to get married that night, her dad just "hmmphed" and changed the TV channel, and her mom said, "Okay, see you later." So she went into her bedroom, packed her little bag and off they went to the justice of the peace.

They'd made such a big deal out of her older brother getting married a couple of years earlier that she was hoping they'd at least show a little enthusiasm for her, or be happy for her. She said it broke her heart. It took until I was 43 before she told me this story. Now I know where her strength came from.

Sorry to go off... but I empathize... {{{{hugs}}}}

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How did I miss this?

MamaPeachy, this teared my eyes and wrenched my gut all at the same time. I continue to have these issues with my father.

It especially hurts that he can't, or won't, try to respect the child rearing decisions I've made. My baby man is growing up attached to me: if I choose to wear him until his feet drag the ground and breast feed until he's unhooking my bra by himself that's my choice! At least he's not being raised by an alcoholic to grow up and be one himself like my sweet but wounded brother.

Anyway, you've brought a lot of emotions to the surface. Thanks for sharing and sorry to rant a bit in your thread.

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That´s the saddest part of it... not only an alcoholic parent can ruin your life but it´s very likely the child will repeat the same behaviour and the abused ones will be the abusers. I have seen that around so many times and I understand it so much, though it´s not my case at all. Your loving attitude towards your kids (and friends and people surrounding you) it´s a great reaction. You´re doing a wonderful job, not only trying to avoid being a failure due to your parents but also giving all that love around you.

To all my bold sf friends! :thumbsup: And mucho love...

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