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Lost SPOILER Thread!


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  • 2 weeks later...

I refuse to let this thread die.


Smookie Monster

Show over. Me still hungry! Hurley keep me full for years! Freckles just crumbs! Jack eye opening! Jin make me hungry hour later! Sawyer name me chocolate swirl! Desmond constant favorite! Nom nombers confusing to see! A is for airplane, that's good enough for me!

I am so buying this shirt.

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hello!? what everyone is forgetting is that they totally left it open for a spinoff. of where Hurley and Ben guard the island. The perfect mix of light hearted comic relief and profound intensity.

Plus I'm sure THAT is where all the science fiction questions will be answered...

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 4 weeks later...

Previously on Lost: Everybody dies. But some don't do it yet. There's a light. Then there's not a light. Then there's a light again. Kate shoots Smokey and says "It's just been revoked" (or something like that). Jack closes his eye. LOST.

The scene opens with a pan through the jungle. The camera settles on Vincent snacking on the fingers of Jack's fresh corpse. Hurley stumbles on the gruesome scene carrying a bucket of Dharma ranch and a Dharma beer. "...Dude."


Hurley and Ben settle down to decide how to run the island now that everyone is gone/deceased. Hurley decides to make it a hippie commune/Mr. Cluck's Chicken Theme Park. Ben is disappointed that he doesn't get to kill anybody. Hurley tears down the lighthouse and uses his Jacob-powers to construct a giant fried-chicken themed roller coaster out of the remains. That's how Jacob-powers work now. Don't ask questions. The other other others that have been hiding somehow for the last six seasons are disgusted with the gluttony that has taken over the island and kidnap Hurley. Hurley's Jacob-powers are unable to get him out of this mess. Don't ask questions. Ben uses a cunning combination of lies and killing people to simultaneously free Hurley and commit the second genocide of his very productive life. He shoots Hurley in the foot just because he can. "Dude!"


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