Foxy Posted December 6, 2005 Report Share Posted December 6, 2005 Not sure how many of the US Songfactors will get the humour in this, but the UK ones certainly will as we experience it on a daily basis somewhere! ---------------------------------------------- There's this bird called Mary, yeah? She's a virgin (wossat then?) She's not married or nuffink, but she's got this boyfriend, Joe, innit? He does joinery an' that. Mary lives with him in a crib dahn Nazaref. One day Mary meets this bloke Gabriel. She's like `Oo ya lookin at?' Gabriel just goes 'You got one up the duff, you have.' Mary's totally gobsmacked. She gives it to him large 'Stop dissin' me yeah? I ain't no Kappa-slapper. I never bin wiv no one!' So Mary goes and sees her cousin Liz, who's six months gone herself. Liz is largin' it. She's filled with spirits, Barcardi Breezers an' thaat. She's like 'Orright, Mary, I can feel me bay-bee in me tummy and I reckon I'm well blessed. Think of all the extra benefits an' that we are gonna get.' Mary goes 'Yeah, s'pose you're right' Mary an' Joe ain't got no money so they have to ponse a donkey, an' go dahn Bethlehem on that. They get to this pub an' Mary wants to stop, yeah? To have her bay-bee an' that. But there ain't no room at the inn, innit? So Mary an' Joe break an' enter into this garridge, only it's filled wiv animals. Cahs an' sheep an' that. Then these three geezers turn up, looking proper bling, wiv crowns ontheir heads. They're like `Respec', bay-bee Jesus', an' say they're wise men from the East End. Joe goes: 'If you're so wise, wotchoo doin' wiv this Frankenstein an'myrrh? Why dincha just bring gold, Adidas and Burberry?' It's all about to kick off when Gabriel turns up again an' sez he's got another message from this Lord geezer. He's like 'The police is comin an' they're killin all the bay-bees. You better nash off to Egypt.' Joe goes 'You must be monged if you think I'm goin' dahn Egypt on a minging donkey' Gabriel sez 'Suit yerself, pal. But it's your look out if you stay.' So they go dahn Egypt till they've stopped killin the first-born an' it's safe an' that. Then Joe and Mary and Jesus go back to Nazaref, an' Jesus turns water into Stella. Have a proper bo Christmas. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DiggsUK Posted December 7, 2005 Report Share Posted December 7, 2005 Wicked!!! Nuf' respec.... Regards Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batman Posted December 7, 2005 Report Share Posted December 7, 2005 haha, that's pretty funnizzle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shawna Posted December 7, 2005 Report Share Posted December 7, 2005 I don't think I've ever read something where the accent was so vividly put down in writing. Hysterical! Except for that, it sounds like a scene unfolding in the east side of downtown San Diego. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katie_sane Posted December 7, 2005 Report Share Posted December 7, 2005 That sort of reminded me of Vicky Pollard from Little Britain (love that show) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
invisible_r Posted December 7, 2005 Report Share Posted December 7, 2005 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarcM Posted December 7, 2005 Report Share Posted December 7, 2005 Is that "The Story of Jesus" as told by Ali G? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earth-Angel Posted December 7, 2005 Report Share Posted December 7, 2005 Innit? Am I bov'd? Am I? AM I? Wha'eva. Minger. Hilarious! ^ That is the extent of my UK slang to date, innit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
invisible_r Posted December 7, 2005 Report Share Posted December 7, 2005 so Mary was wearing burbery and had a croydon/council estate face lift, with a plastic comb stuck in her hair? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Seeker Posted December 7, 2005 Report Share Posted December 7, 2005 Where did you find that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Foxy Posted December 7, 2005 Author Report Share Posted December 7, 2005 On another forum I regularly frequent Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lonelyday Posted December 12, 2005 Report Share Posted December 12, 2005 I can't stop thinking and talking with an accent now, I'm struggling so hard with this, just to not use the british slang Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarah_Star Posted December 12, 2005 Report Share Posted December 12, 2005 Dat is bear good innit?? Sound man - I iz guna go tell all me matez at da park 2nite when we iz gettin off our 'eadz on White Lightenin and 2020. hee hee hee!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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