Uncle Joe 0 Report post Posted August 2, 2005 These are entries to a Washington Post competition asking for a rhyme with the most romantic first line but the least romantic second line. Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss But I slept with you because I was pissed. I thought that I could love no other Until, that is, I met your brother. Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you. But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty, and so is your head. Kind, intelligent, loving, and hot. This describes everything you're not. I want to feel your sweet embrace But don't take that bag from off your face. I love your smile, your face, your eyes. Damn, I'm good at telling lies! My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife, Marrying you screwed up my life. I see your face when I am dreaming. That's why I always wake up screaming. My love, you take my breath away. What have you stepped in to smell this way? What inspired this amorous rhyme? Two parts vodka, one part lime. Care to try a few of your own? Let's see what you've got. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
edna 6 Report post Posted August 2, 2005 That would be good for MAD magazine... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
_Laurie_ 7 Report post Posted August 2, 2005 ^ LOL joe, that's funny...I'm not that poetic but I'll give it a try You are the man that I adore, but those nose hairs I just cant ignore! You bring love and joy into my life, but then you brought your wife Words cant express how you make me feel untill you asked me, are those real? hey this is fun Joe! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Uncle Joe 0 Report post Posted August 2, 2005 Ok, ok...I'll go first. Your love makes me all warm inside Because you gave me an infection When I'm near you I just melt It's one way to escape you Your skin is like silk Let me make myself a shirt from it Your smile lights up a room Unfortunately that makes it easier to see you Your hair is like like lavender But who could smell it over that breath C'mon now...your turn. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Levis 5 Report post Posted August 3, 2005 You're good at this Ms. Laurie... are you sure those aren't yours? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
_Laurie_ 7 Report post Posted August 3, 2005 I just made them up Levis Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shawna 1 Report post Posted August 3, 2005 Your lips are velvet softness, like the petals on a rose And I just can't stop staring ~ you've got something in your nose. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
_Laurie_ 7 Report post Posted August 7, 2005 They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder... that's why I buried your bones, way over yonder :: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jenny 2 Report post Posted August 19, 2005 Darling, I love feeling you next to me But could you move? I can't see the TV Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Foxy 0 Report post Posted August 21, 2005 A hot night together, we're on the verge Truth be told, I feel the need to urge Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Batman 2 Report post Posted August 23, 2005 Roses are red, violets are blue sugar is sweet, and you are a dishonest, skanky, filthy scumbag. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jenny 2 Report post Posted August 29, 2005 I really love to see you smile But your breath is really vile I love your eyes, your hair, your nose But please, Uncle Joe, put on some clothes! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Earth-Angel 0 Report post Posted August 29, 2005 Uncle, Jenny has spoken! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
miamisammy29 4 Report post Posted August 29, 2005 I fell in love with you the moment we met It's the five years together that I'd rather forget A moonlit dinner was what you wished and yet you never even touched your Filet O' Fish I took you home, my pretty wallflower Now the hair from your back is clogging my shower If I never loved you and I never thrilled you it would be much easier for me to kill you Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
_Laurie_ 7 Report post Posted August 29, 2005 Sammy that's great!, I love it, you're so poetic Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Uncle Joe 0 Report post Posted August 29, 2005 Uncle, Jenny has spoken! One more crack like that and I'm getting dressed. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Earth-Angel 0 Report post Posted August 29, 2005 Well, Jenny, what are you waiting for?! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jenny 2 Report post Posted August 30, 2005 Ok, here goes: With you Uncle Joe we are obsessed We'd like to see you fully dressed Sorry...best I could do Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jugband_Blues 0 Report post Posted August 30, 2005 I love you so much that I want you to know this isn't the first time I've been with a hobo I feel warm when around you, like I'm under a spell, though it's prob'ly cause you came here from straight out of hell Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Foxy 0 Report post Posted August 30, 2005 You told me you loved me, that you never would lie But when I cut off your bo##ocks, man did you cry! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Batman 2 Report post Posted August 31, 2005 I love you so much, and I'll prove it tonight but first I must ask, "you're 18, right?" I love you so much, I love it when we meet but the restraining order's pushed me back 100 feet. I love you so much, you are so very nice that I almost forget your very high price. My wife went on vacation, I can't believe how much I missed her, But I really did have a good time with her sister. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kevin 3 Report post Posted September 1, 2005 (edited) If " a rose by any other name would smell as sweet " then , sadly , it's pointless to relabel your feet. Oh . Looks like Batman and I have a foot fetish ... " Oh , Romeo , Romeo ... wherefore art thou ? " " In a brothel , in Thailand , you silly old cow ! " Though she was naked and sexy and , oh! , so fine ... she was but a picture that I'd seen online. Edited September 1, 2005 by Guest Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
_Laurie_ 7 Report post Posted September 1, 2005 wow...you songfactor guys are just so romantic Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kevin 3 Report post Posted September 1, 2005 (edited) I took her body , her money , and drank all of her wine , but because I'm not greedy , I left her her mind . alternative ending : but t'was 9 months later when she repaid me in kind . I love, you , I need you , without you I'm sunk , are the words you will hear when your husband is drunk. Like a Ferrari , she purred , curvaceous , and bold but I'm trading her in 'cause she's now very old . (ducks! ) Edited September 1, 2005 by Guest Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
_Laurie_ 7 Report post Posted September 1, 2005 gee kev..it just keeps getting better all the time... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
