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Ummm, please dont laugh, im only small....


Mairi

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Yeh, im fairly new(ok, i just joined yesterday but whatever) and im only 14 so consider my age while you read this and please, no rotten fruit throwing!

(its a poem)

Broken

Bottled up

Anger, fear, hatred, jealousy, lonliness

Ouside seemingly

Happy, odd, carefree

not me at all

I lie here, drowning in self-loathe

asphixiated by higher power

gasping in my namesake.

Was it fate or something i decided?

A sea of bitterness, artificial?

Natural?

Perhaps outer sources

Aliens to my thoughts, destruct but create

power turns to greed and greed to

Mutilation

fraying of edges,cluttered emotions

screaming, screaming

barely a whisper, notifyed and registered as

Nothingness

So i stay here

drowning my sorrows in words and punctuation

lines upon lines of meaningless wanderings

of a broken mind.

(it may sound very morbid and scary but it was a dark time for me)

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Well for starters WELCOME TO SONG FACTS!!! good to have another Writter!!! :D Now, you Poem was very deep and very metephorical, and for that I am Envious, I wish I could be metephorical in my lyrics too, but I am not, your writing is VERY well done, Metephorical, and yet easy to understand, GOOD JOB!!!

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thank you very much ::, i was a bit wary in case people would laugh or something. just in case yo were wondering, it was about my low self-esteem but i think that's pretty clear lol. there's a part in it that says "ea of bitterness". i added this in because my name is gaelic for mary which means sea of bitterness, just some facts for ya, hope it didnt spoil the poem!

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Well done Marz!

I really liked it, really well written, you should be extremely proud!

I particulary likes these lines..

So i stay here

drowning my sorrows in words and punctuation

lines upon lines of meaningless wanderings

of a broken mind.

..Really good stuff, fair play :thumbsup:

Have a bannana

:happybanana:

:happybanana: :happybanana: :happybanana:

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and well done mairi btw, for someone of your age that's very good work (i don't mean that patronisingly i hope you understand. i wrote lots of similar stuff when i was the same age... oh so long ago! :laughing: )

also, i don't know how you don't like your name?! i thnk it's gorgeous, my gran's name is maire, the irish version. how do you pronounce yours?

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urgh, people who crack the same jokes over and over again are just ignoramuses(i dont know how to spell therefore i am an ignoramus) like the ever so funny "mairi who you gonna marry?" or "mairi will you marry me" its put me off marriage all together (almost). there was one time when i laughed at one but it was becasue it was so crap "Mairi Christmas" :happybanana:

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