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If You Could Take Anything Back...


windy1
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  • 4 months later...

I guess I would take back all the nasty things I said to my Mum, and I would stop myself from still saying them today.

My Dad caused all of my bad childhood memories, and I never understood why Mum didn't take us out of there. I know all the reasons why she couldn't, and I understand, and I must be such a selfish person to still occasionally bring it up in an arguement, but it still feels fresh and raw. I hope one day soon that all this talking about the bad stuff I've been doing the last 7-8 years will pay off and will just let me accept Mums decisions and feel like I have closure on it.

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Who hasnt made a decision they would take back? Jesus. lol

Well, i would take back hurting this one girl, i did to her what my ex JUST did to me. The day that me and Britt broke up, i called up 3 girls that i have hurt before. I apologized and apologized. Me and another girl are actually getting close again. Everything does happen for a reason. Life doesnt suck...just events in it.

I have to agree with XXX that, we wouldnt know what would happen if we changed that one thing. Could it be a difference in life or death...love or hurt? I guess we will never know.

We only get one chance at this guys!

PEACE

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Everything does happen for a reason. Life doesnt suck...just events in it.

I have to agree with XXX that, we wouldnt know what would happen if we changed that one thing. Could it be a difference in life or death...love or hurt? I guess we will never know.

We only get one chance at this guys!

PEACE

Very true words psychocatholic.

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i generally wouldnt want to change anything, but i guess it would have been good to have been a bit more chilled out and less shy, cos i would have made more friends and had more fun in university, which is supposed to be the best time of your life... i met up with groups of people and didnt talk cos i was worried they would laugh at me or something, how stupid!

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there are lots of things i'd change if i could, but then the things that happened to me have formed the person i am today. mainly what i'd change is i'd have spoken up sooner when i was a teen about what was upsetting me instead of trying to cope with it alone with not-so-positive results. i'd have chosen better people to confide in, like my mum, or a teacher, rather than choosing my best friends at the time who just couldn't handle what i had to tell them.

something else i'd change would be the way i behaved in irish class when one of my teachers was teaching me. he was a young man, very gentle, and most of his students acted the maggot in his class, playing tricks on him, refusing to pay attention, never doing homework etc. we all thought it was a bit of fun. at the beginning of my final year in school he came in with a persistent coldsore on his lip. by that stage my class were older, more mature and taking our exams seriously so we were finally behaving ourselves. but i know that younger girls made silly jokes about the source of this coldsore etc. unfortunately it turned out to be melanoma and he died in february aged only 28. the whole school was devastated, not just at the tragic loss of such a young and gentle soul but because of the guilt we felt at how difficult we had made his life. i can't even think about it without crying. i wish that i at least had had the maturity to show him the respect he deserved from day one, others in the class looked up to me and i know they would have followed my example. i think everyone should realise that, that they have the power to change a cycle of abuse. what i did was like standing back and watching someone else be teased or bullied, it's equally cowardly. i'm truly sorry.

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There was that time my boss fired me. I wanted to punch his lights out. I didn't. Bothered me for days.

Then, the SOB dies on the exact anniversary of the date he fired me. That made me feel so gooooooooood. I'm so sorry about that. If i could just take it back....I wouldn't!

Life's just too damned short for what-ifs (no matter how much fun it is to play). Best to just move on, move ahead. Learn from it but don't dwell on it. God hasn't given anyone a second chance yet. Not even his beloved son. Eh?

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