windy1 Posted September 26, 2004 Report Posted September 26, 2004 Have you ever made a decision or done something that looking back you would do differently? Most people when asked say they would live their lives exactly as they have. I am wondering if this is necessarily true. Anything from shoplifting, or cheating on a important test as a kid, to something that was life defining. I think most people have something in their lives that they wish they had handled differently. For me it was getting married right out of high school, instead of getting that college degree that Daddy was going to pay for first. I would still have married the man I love today, but early marriage put a severe strain on the money situation, so college just never happened. How about you?
XXX Posted September 26, 2004 Report Posted September 26, 2004 Take back a life decision for what purpose? Because the other choice guarantees a better result? There's no way of knowing that, though. We'd like to fancy that it would be better, but every decision carries the potential to make us unhappy in the end. Rather, I'd like to think of decisions I regret as learning experiences and strive to become happy with myself. Knowing then what I know now takes a bit from the mystery of life
Jimmy1104 Posted September 26, 2004 Report Posted September 26, 2004 XXX....that was so profound. I think reflecting on the decisions you made is definitely more positive than wondering what would have happened if you took the other route, whatever it was. Life is a learning experience and we can only learn by our mistakes (for those of you who have made mistakes) and become a better person by them.
Earth-Angel Posted September 26, 2004 Report Posted September 26, 2004 I would never let my doctor talk me into taking the pill - then I would never have had my DVT. That is one of the biggest things that has changed my life in almost every way.
windy1 Posted September 26, 2004 Author Report Posted September 26, 2004 C'mon. I knew I was going to get answers like this. XXX what you say is so true and profound. I am the eternal optimist, and try always to make something good out of something bad, even if is is just to learn from it, and I don't just mean just. That is important. I would not change my life, my marriage, children and living in the real world, have made me the person I am. But i still wish I had that degree. Sound a little like the Scarecrow don't I?
XXX Posted September 26, 2004 Report Posted September 26, 2004 To answer the question more properly, then: To name one thing I would take back would probably be to smile and laugh more. I think, had I learned the art of laughing and forgetting earlier on I'd be reaping the benefits now in terms of more friends and acquaintances. It's actually pretty hard for me to think of past regrets either because I haven't lived much or because I've already made peace with those thoughts
windy1 Posted September 26, 2004 Author Report Posted September 26, 2004 Good answer ~ a smile goes a long way.
Danielj Posted September 26, 2004 Report Posted September 26, 2004 I would like a better way to resolve fights with my bro than fighting with him. It ALMOST cost me the Aussie PFconcert But I'm still going in 4 days! :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: = :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :guitar: :guitar: :guitar: :guitar: :guitar:
Aunt_Acid Posted September 26, 2004 Report Posted September 26, 2004 I think the biggest mistake I ever made was not eating all of that guy's pie, because he was in the bathroom for another 5 or 10 minutes.
MindCrime Posted September 26, 2004 Report Posted September 26, 2004 Excellent Thread Windy If I could rebuild from just one thing, it most likely would have been the decisions I took with my ex-fiancé; I would have done everything right the first time around, without being asked. I tried to develop a relationship based on firm equality & trust, when I should have realized this was a preliminary loophole in its entirety. I would focus more on commitment & being sympathetic for her. It?s unrealistic to have a strong connection with someone, when you don?t know each other sufficiently well to begin with. No matter how devoted & caring you are, without understanding her, you still have nothing to show for what you?ve given your love.
_jr_ Posted September 29, 2004 Report Posted September 29, 2004 If I had known the history of alcoholism in my family, and my predisposition to it, I probably would have never taken that first drink. I wasted a lot of time and money on that stuff. The thing I regret most, though, is the way I hurt everyone in my life. It's not that I feel bad for me. I acted like an idiot and got everything I deserved. I feel bad for them, because they did nothing to deserve what they got. Some alcoholics keep private the fact that they are alcoholics, and that's fine. I don't. It doesn't define me, it's just part of who I am. I don't beat people over the head with it. However, I probably wouldn't be as appreciative of what I have now if I had never traveled that road. I wake up every day, happy, centered, and I kiss my wife and kids while they're still asleep before I leave for work. I'm the luckiest guy out there, and I know it. I laugh everyday. So some good did come from it. Still in all, if I could go back, I'd have never started.
windy1 Posted September 29, 2004 Author Report Posted September 29, 2004 Oh Jr, what a man! I grew up with an alcoholic mother, one who would never admit it until just a few years before she died. I remember the nights she was drunk and lonely, and she would drag me out of bed, to cry and beg me to tell her how much I loved her. Then I'd get up and go to school the next morning. Tough stuff for a kid to deal with, and it's wonderful that you realize how hard it is for family. I've never been a drinker, and I know that's why. I remember too much.
MuzikTyme Posted September 29, 2004 Report Posted September 29, 2004 Truly interesting as I wonder where I would be if I had never taken that first drink and also wonder where I'd be if I hadn't finally admitted to myself that I'm an alcoholic and stopped. I'm one that believes everything happens for a reason, good or bad, ultimately our happiness derives from it. If I could take anything back, it'd be my Veg-A-Matic. The darn thing never worked right.
edna Posted September 29, 2004 Report Posted September 29, 2004 First, I would pay more attention in school. Then, I would go on and graduate from University. And marry my fiancé-by then and raise a family in my country and be rich. But I fell in love with Spain, it was springtime, I had a wonderfull job, money, friends, love, concerts, my appartment, I travelled and I had so much fun... Now I have another house, another husband and lots of money problems! But I don´t regret it, if I could take something back it would be maybe... don´t take that first q!
TheCyberdemon Posted September 29, 2004 Report Posted September 29, 2004 I would take off my headphones that morning I got hit by the car.
Aunt_Acid Posted September 29, 2004 Report Posted September 29, 2004 It's illegal to drive with headphones on, CD. I'm glad you got in that accident. Hopefully it taught you a lesson. If not, I hope you die next time. A headphoned driver killed my brother.
XXX Posted September 29, 2004 Report Posted September 29, 2004 It's illegal to drive with headphones on, CD. I'm glad you got in that accident. Hopefully it taught you a lesson. If not, I hope you die next time. A headphoned driver killed my brother. Brothers Against Headphoned Drivers... B.A.H.D. But, then, that would also take into account people on cell phones who have that headset.
TheCyberdemon Posted September 29, 2004 Report Posted September 29, 2004 F*** you Dave. I was WALKING across a cross-walk, which I had the legal right away. Some guy actually wasn't paying attention and coasted right into me. I have a cd-player in my car.
Aunt_Acid Posted September 29, 2004 Report Posted September 29, 2004 Well cell phone head sets don't really rub me the wrong way. The girl usually listened to tapes in her car around the time she killed my brother in that barfight.
Earth-Angel Posted September 29, 2004 Report Posted September 29, 2004 F*** you Dave. I was WALKING across a cross-walk, which I had the legal right away. Some guy actually wasn't paying attention and coasted right into me. I have a cd-player in my car. Glad you're alright after that, alot of people don't make it after car crashes. Nothing funny about someone almost being killed.
_Annabelle_ Posted September 29, 2004 Report Posted September 29, 2004 When I was in fourth grade there was a girl in my class who I became good friends with. When we entered fifth grade I started hanging around with a different group but we were still friends. But one day over something so stupid I can't even remember it, I began to completely ignore her and dislike her. My new friends and I would tease and mock her at lunch or recess. I've always regreted being so cruel to someone who did nothing (that I can remember anyway but that still wouldn't justify it) to me. She moved away and then I did, but I still would have liked to apologize for my awful behaviour and to become friends with her again.
Earth-Angel Posted September 29, 2004 Report Posted September 29, 2004 It's never to late to get in touch with her Aneabelle. Even if she isn't interested in speaking to you, you will be more at peace with knowing you at least tried
TheCyberdemon Posted September 29, 2004 Report Posted September 29, 2004 That's funny, it's like those stupid Disney movies, but reversed roles.
_Annabelle_ Posted September 29, 2004 Report Posted September 29, 2004 It's never to late to get in touch with her Aneabelle. Even if she isn't interested in speaking to you, you will be more at peace with knowing you at least tried That is good advice Earth-angel and thank you. The problem is though I don't have any idea where she lives now and I don't know anyone who would know. I don't dwell on it and I hope she doesn't either... this thread just reminded me.
windy1 Posted September 30, 2004 Author Report Posted September 30, 2004 Annabelle, I found my best friend( from age 7-14)who I hadn't had contact with for more than 30 years on one of those classmates websites. I went all the way back to grade school. It was dumb I thought at the time, but I was amazed to find her there. Now that is something I did take back-our friendship. We talk all the time now, even though we're in different states. Now everybody say aawwww! ::
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