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Today Or Never

TheLizard

By TheLizard
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TheLizard land shark

TheLizard

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“Today or never.â€

That’s what he always told us. I remember the first day I met Billy. This long haired weirdo angel who none of us really understood, even at the end. I was at a concert. There was a girl there. I never caught her name, but damn she was pretty – the kind of pretty that makes your lungs feel like they fell into your scrotum for a half-second, and then leaves you gasping for air and questioning your masculinity. I must have been staring at her, because from behind me I heard “What are you waiting for, man? Today or never.â€

I turned towards the voice. There he was. At first I couldn’t tell if he was a really ugly woman or just a strange looking man. Turns out he was the latter.

“Quit gawking. You have a job to do. Today or never,†he said. It was strange, if somebody else said that to me, I would have told them to ******* off. But before I could open my mouth, I realized he was right. As if possessed, I turned around and walked up to the girl. I can’t even remember what I said to her. It must have really been something, because she slapped me right in the face.

At first I was angry. At myself, at her, at this mysterious stranger who made me do what I never had the balls to do before. And then I turned around and looked at him. And he was grinning. And I laughed. I laughed so hard I could feel my insides burning, and then I laughed some more.

The long haired weirdo angel walked up to me and said, “I’m Billy. You made the right choice. Keep it up. Join us.†He gave me a piece of paper and walked away.

I forgot about the paper until next morning, when I found it rolled up in my pocket. It appeared to be directions. Wondering what the hell was wrong with me, I immediately set about following the directions to whatever location it led me to. All the while thinking “this is stupid,†I ran through the twists and turns that led me to a small enclave in a grove of trees. There was absolutely nothing there, of course. It was that jackass Billy’s idea of a prank, it had to be. But then I heard voices. They got closer and closer, and I was worried that this prank was about to turn violent. About two dozen teenage guys crept out from the trees. Ready for a fight, I tensed. But they just stood there. I turned to walk away from this strangeness, when Billy emerged. I stayed. I had to. I didn’t know why, but I had to.

“Today or never,†said Billy.

“Today or never!†repeated the rest.

Billy began: “Today we have a new member with us. One that followed the way of today or never. One that will cherish the way, as you all have.â€

“Welcome!†said the rest.

“Of course,†continued Billy, “we have to make sure. He passed one test, but life is a continuous string of tests. He grasped one today, but we shall see if this today will be his as well.â€

The rest nodded in agreement.

“So, new man, how many laws have you broken?†asked Billy.

“Um… none,†I replied truthfully. For some reason I felt a sense of shame in these words.

“Take this spray paint. Go to your school. Paint ‘today or never’ on the walls. Show the world and yourself how to live.â€

Grabbing the paint can he threw at me, I felt a sense of danger and power that I had never felt before. Without a word, I ran. I didn’t even have to look at the directions; it was as if the little space between the trees was already my second home, and the surrounding area was as familiar to me as anything else I ever knew. Before I knew it, I was at the school. Without a thought, I began my dirty work. Dear God did it feel good. I felt that I was spitting in the face of the establishment. I felt like each letter was my orgasmic discharge on the face of everyone who had ever tried to put me in my place. I felt just how Billy knew I would feel.

I finished, and Billy appeared from behind me. I will never know how he appeared with such perfect timing.

“Good. You’re one of us. Next week, same time, same place,†and with that he walked off into whatever dimensional abyss he inhabited.

I went, of course. Another challenge awaited. This time each of us were told to steal something worth more than $50 and bring it back as proof. This makes Billy sound like some Fagin-style devil, but I assure you he was anything but. He did not keep anything we brought; he just wanted proof that we had it. Again, with the crime came the thrill, the ecstasy. There was no point besides our own glorious hedonism. We only had one life to live, and it could end any time, so today or never.

Each week there was something new, something bigger for us to do. We never knew each other’s names. All that mattered was ourselves, and, of course, Billy.

From petty theft to vandalism to mugging, each week’s challenge became more intense and exciting. I could not get enough. Each week became harder to get through in anticipation of whatever madness Billy could concoct for me to pull off.

One night, Billy pulled me aside.

“You’ve been one of the best I ever taught,†he said.

“Thank you. I owe everything to you.â€

“Are you faithful?â€

“You know I am.â€

“Are you ready?â€

“For anything.â€

“The ultimate thrill is coming. You are the first of my pupils to receive this mission. Carry it out well. It is time for you to feel what it is like to take a life.â€

Words caught in my mouth. Nothing could have prepared me for that.

“You hesitate,†said Billy. “Is something wrong?â€

“Nothing at all,†I replied. “I’m honored to receive this duty.†I meant it, too. My initial shock had quickly faded into wonderful expectation.

“Good. 125 Acacia Avenue. There is a man living alone there. You will relieve him of his living burden, and in the process achieve a grasp on your own life that you have never known. Wait here a few hours, and then go. Today or never.â€

“Today or never,†I replied, deferentially.

After some time had passed, I made my way to the address I was given. Fear and excitement clouded my mind, kept me from second guessing myself, or even more blasphemously, second guessing Billy. I arrived at the door. It was unlocked. This seemed odd at first, but I just attributed it to the luck that comes with following the will of Billy. I stumbled around the dark house, trying to make as little noise as possible. Discovering myself in the kitchen, I grabbed a knife. It felt magnificent in my hands. I felt like God himself, with the ability to strike down whoever I wish. I made my way upstairs. There he was, sleeping in his chair, a dark silhouette, peacefully dreaming of a life that only had seconds left. I knew that I may not have much time to act, so I rushed towards the sleeping figure and plunged the knife into his beating heart. Such joy.

Then it all unraveled. I stood back to inspect my victim. I wanted to watch the life leave his eyes. I found the light and turned it on. The glow revealed a sight that made me retch. It was Billy. Precious Billy, lying there covered in blood. Blood I had spilled. He looked up at me, with blood trickling out of the faint smile of his lips. With his last breath, he whispered in a voice that could barely be heard: “Today or never.â€

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scott sea turtle

scott

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I was gonna say that the idea could be a little more developed

ya know, give some more examples of the tasks billy had the narrator do, cuz as the story stands it goes

vandalism

to petty theft

to murder....

No real complaint, it doesn't take too much away, it's just hard to make that bridge.

but then I realized that would make it a lot like fight club.

but borrowing ideas and reworking them has been done a lot,

think of how many Shakespeare plots get recycled

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