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Sung to the tune of...

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Profuse apologies if this subject has been discussed before. Mad magazine did/does it, JibJab does it, comedians do it. Start with a known song's melody and write different words/subject to comic/satiric effect. Rap Reiplinger took "Rhinestone Cowboy" as a point of departure and here's the result:

"Puka Shell Tour Guide" by Rap Reiplinger

This big old bus is hot, my two front tires are shot

Everybody's bugging me to make a stop at the Blow Hole

They all look the same to me, wearing plastic leis, Bermudas and bony knees

I got a tour group in from Nevada, I wouldn't be here unless I hadta

I greet 'em, I "lei" 'em, I say: "Come follow me"

I'm your Puka Shell tour guide and my name is "Kimo," I'll be showing you around the town

I'm your information station, your all-star native clown, and your only way to get around

I took 'em on a canoe ride, a fat lady fell off the side (chuckles), but everybody's yellin' at me 'cause they all got sun burned

Their bags all weigh a ton, I'm bustin' my buns while they're havin' all the fun

But I'm the man who keeps things going, Yes, I'm the man who keeps on showing that the spirit of Aloha is alive alive and well real swell

I'm a Puka Shell tour guide, driving into the sunset with people I don't even know

I'm a Puka Shell Tour guide, busing camera-toting tourists to the latest Polynesian show, and places I don't wanna go

(Aloooha! "Alooha" Aloooha! "Alooha") :jester:

Earlier, Rap took "Tell Laura I Love Her" and turned it into an off key surfer's lament/love song: "Fate Yanagi." (But that's another story...) :hippie:

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