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Karhul

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Posts posted by Karhul

  1. If this is supposed to sound like a letter written to a friend, then it's a great way to approach the subject and you've definitely made the point clear. But if it's supposed to be a poem, then it lacks structure and flow. Same thing if it's supposed to be a song. But like I said, if it's just a letter or just a thought, then it sounds great.
    Your right, it's a letter to a friend, and it's what I'm thinking. :rockon:
  2. This is about my friends Aidan who I havn't seen in a long time because he is lazy and is backsliding (A term for falling away from God, feel free to ask questions about it). Tell me what you think please.

    Backsliding

    I havn't seen you in a long time

    Youv'e seen your job and your bed more than your friends

    I miss you alot Aidan

    You don'y have much time for anyone anymore

    Even your girlfriend

    Why are you so lazy?

    You don't go to church anymore on Sunday

    Or to AWANA on Friday night

    I don't think everyone misses you as much

    But I do

    Your fading away in their minds

    But not mine

    My last memory of you was on a trampoline

    Or at Awana

    I can't remember

    It was so long ago

    Please come back

    Not for me

    For you

    You are backsliding

    And you know it

    Drink Coffee if that would help

    Everyone who goes to church on Sunday has to get up early

    So why can't you?

    And why not on Friday?

    That's not too hard for you

    I've had bad times too Aidan

    But this, this is just not right

    I want to stay your friend

    But your drifting away from us all

    Please come back Aidan

    I miss you

    Well, how is it?. :beatnik:

  3. Back in Black!!!.

    Back in black

    I hit the sack

    I've been too long I'm glad to be back [i bet you know I'm...]

    Yes, I'm let loose

    From the noose

    That's kept me hanging about

    I've been looking at the sky

    'Cause it's gettin' me high

    Forget the hearse 'cause I never die

    I got nine lives

    Cat size!

    Abusin' every one of them and running wild

    CHORUS:

    'Cause I'm back

    Yes, I'm back

    Well, I'm back

    Yes, I'm back

    Well, I'm back, back

    (Well) I'm back in black

    Yes, I'm back in black

    Back in the back

    Of a Cadillac

    Number one with a bullet, I'm a power pack

    Yes, I'm in a bang

    With a gang

    They've got to catch me if they want me to hang

    Cause I'm back on the track

    And I'm beatin' the flack

    Nobody's gonna get me on another rap

    So look at me now

    I'm just makin' my play

    Don't try to push your luck, just get out of my way

    CHORUS

    Well, I'm back, Yes I'm back

    Well, I'm back, Yes I'm back

    Well, I'm back, back

    Well I'm back in black

    Yes I'm back in black

    hooo yeah

    Ohh yeah

    Yes I am

    Oooh yeah, yeah Oh yeah

    Back in now

    Well I'm back, I'm back

    Back, I'm back

    Back, I'm back

    Back, I'm back

    Back, I'm back

    Back

    Back in black

    Yes I'm back in black

    Out of the sight

    :rockon: :rockon:

  4. Constructive criticism? It's a bit cliched. Try spending more time on it and think over better ways to phrase the love you feel for the girl. You'll be a lot prouder of it if you spend lots of time working on it to get it perfect.

    :rockon:

    It was just something I thought of before I posted it. I'm going to try write some songs about myths and legends, and Isaac Newton :beatnik: :rockon:
  5. Best of Nirvana is good, too bad Cobain blew his own head off, what an idiot. I find it a bit annoying when bands release a greatest hits album, and they are still around, such as the Red Hot Chili Peppers, but it's still a good album. I think AC/DC's best of album would be a mixture of Back in Black and High Voltage. :rockon: :rockon:

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